VATICAN grants BEIN channel exclusive broadcast of all Weddings!

Rumors circulating in the hallways of the Vatican have just been confirmed.

In a twisted turn of events, Pope Francis just announced that the Catholic Church has just signed a multi-billion Dollar deal granting the BEIN channel exclusivity in covering and broadcasting all weddings in the Middle East.

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As soon as the deal was sealed, all wedding video tapes illegally taken by professional studios were confiscated from homes.

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Cliché wedding photos that once stood proudly in all living rooms and photo albums were also destroyed beyond recognition.


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Numerous “Tantes” and “3Ammos” are now facing long prison time for Skyping live wedding ceremonies illegally to their families abroad.

Governments also respected the exclusivity agreement by forcing Mondanité, Layalina and other such magazines to replace all wedding photos by a pitch black square thus spreading frustration and chaos among women who remain unable to tell who wore what and where.

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Finally, high tech modern technology was introduced to scan for any mental pictures or memories playing in couples’ minds and surprisingly replaced them by old scenes from Tele Liban’s Shoushou.

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One solution offered by the channel for people who insist on remembering their D day, is to group all relatives and friends to watch the wedding tape in a Shisha café which has to pay a minimum 10K$ fee for this right of broadcast.

The cherry on top of the wedding cake? A clause in the contract allowing BEIN to replace the romantic music in your wedding’s background video by the famous proffesional commentator who can guarantee, in traditional Arabic, the cheers and excitement any girl would dream of!

This post is a parody and none of the information in it should be taken too seriously. Any similarity in names with real life ones is purely coincidental. No animals were hurt in the making of this Blog Post.

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